The Beginning and Brittany...

Today Doug and I took Emma Grace over to a friends house for some Memorial Day festivities.  This is the first time she has really been to visit anyone since her birth due to her heart condition so I was excited and nervous at the same time.  Our friend's Stephen and Pam made sure there weren't a lot of people there so we could do it.  As we were visiting, I realized that Stephen and another friend Bill were the individuals God used to introduce Doug and I in 2004.   He knew then, that through these two men, Doug and I were going to begin our love story and  six years later that would allow Emma Grace to enter the world.  I never realized how beautiful our story really was until recently and now it all makes perfect sense.

Doug and I married June 5, 2009 and I instantly had a beautiful family.  I inherited an amazing teenage daughter named Brittany and the three of us moved to Plano, TX.  I found out I was pregnant in September as Brittany entered her Sophomore year of high school and it was awesome to see how excited she was to have a baby sister. Looking back now, I see how God was preparing us to be Emma's family.  I can clearly see it in Brittany's life.  While many teenagers are trying out for cheerleading and sports, Brittany was applying for the PAL's program at school.  This is a Peer Assistant and Leadership program which provides students with an opportunity to mentor teach and lead other students in the special education programs.  I remember being amazed at her character and feeling honored that God had allowed me to be a part of her life.  She was teaching me and I didn't even know it.  I often think about when Emma Grace was born and how my initial reaction was that of devastation.  Brittany had waited the same ten months I had for her sister to be born.  If she was devastated, she didn't show it. She displayed that she was definitely cut from the same cloth as her father.  It was because of the two of them that I began to see the beauty that was right in front of me.  My heavenly Father had created a beautiful family for me but my selfish pride was blinding me from seeing it.  I couldn't see how truly special Emma really was through the monitors and tests that were being run.  All I could see were Cardiologists and Pediatricians and Heart surgeons and Down Syndrome...at first.

I have had to ask God for forgiveness for being so asleep that first week.  And then, I have had to thank him countlessly for awakening me.  It's amazing what one sees once they're awake...

Church Foreshadowing...

Last night as I prayed in bed, I remembered something that I thought was interesting.  God speaks to us in many ways and sometimes it is in hindsight that we notice.  The Sunday before Emma Grace was born, Doug and I attended a church service with some friends.  In that service the pastor asked in his sermon, "If God called on you today, would you do anything he asked of you?".  Of course Doug and I shook our heads YES in agreement.  From what I can remember the entire congregation did.  Little did I know, that God was calling on us alright and in less than 72 hours our calling would be known.  I don't know if I had known then what I know now that I would have shook my head yes with no reluctance.  It is easy to say that you will do whatever God wants when you think it is going to be the way YOU think it should be.  Let's just say, it is easy to be "okay" with God's will when it fits into your expectations.  I knew I was going to be giving birth to a beautiful baby girl in the coming days and I knew that was a part of "The Plan".  What I didn't know, was "The Plan" was going to look much different than I ever could have imagined.  When I laid eyes on my baby girl for the first time, I knew something wasn't quite the way I thought it should be.  In my head I was thinking "I should be feeling utter happiness right in this moment".  In my heart I knew she had Down Syndrome and I began to panic.  A feeling of complete terror came over me as I looked at her and then looked at my husband.  If it wasn't Down's what was it?  Something wasn't right...or was it?  I hope I can tell the beautiful story of Emma Grace and how she came to us. I will need to start from the beginning but that will have to wait until tomorrow...

New Parent Meeting

Sunday May 23rd Doug and I attended the New Parent Meeting for the Down Syndrome Guild.  It was an opportunity to get some information on DS and meet other parents of children with DS.  As a mother, I was excited to get to meet other parents yet I found myself tearing up as we walked into the room.  Doug, once again was my rock as I walked nervously in and by taking my hand, he let me know that it was going to be okay.  I have to say that it was surreal at first.  As the meeting went on, I began to feel the nearness of God and a sense of calmness came over me.  I realized, I was not alone.  Then, I had the blessing of meeting some mothers and their children.  These kids absolutely stole my heart!  It was in that moment that I knew that Doug and I's purpose was much more than we could have ever imagined.  We have been chosen by God to be a part of an amazing journey.  All children are a blessing and our daughter is certainly that.  In the three weeks that Emma has been on this earth, she has already began to show me things that I would have never otherwise seen...

It's the Simple Things

Aunt Char Char came to visit for the week.  She moved to South Padre a month ago but planned on coming back into town once Emma Grace was born to help out.  Once I saw the hipstamatic iphone app, I had to have it and we literally spent hours taking pictures of Emma.  

Emma Grace Wilson